unemployed trouble maker (this describes him to a T) just add bully, gets others to fight for him , while he is playing ‘victim’.
If you turn the tables on a narcissist and start treating him the same way he treated you—like a snotty used tissue—he will panic. He could make it all go away in an instant by constructively resolving the conflict like an adult; i.e., by admitting his mistakes and making amends. This seems like “conceding defeat” to him, and in his NPD-riddled mind would make him into an utterly worthless human. Instead, he will become enraged to the point of incoherence and continue on his campaign of self-destruction, calling that “winning.”
The narcissist will immediately convene a meeting of all of his most loyal flying monkeys, detailing and embellishing the “abuse” you subjected him to, conveniently omitting what he did to cause you to behave this way. For example, he may have called you any number of slanderous names to place the fault on you for his own problems and behavior—such as “homewrecker,” “husband-snatcher,” and “whore”— but if you in return call him a “thief,” then YOU are an abuser! He will paint himself as a poor little lamb, picked out at random by an insane person (you) for torment. His loyal monkeys will up the ante trying to insult and intimidate you, making themselves look like the crazy ones for publicly bullying and shaming a fellow human who everyone else knows to be perfectly nice. The narcissist, meanwhile, will run and hide. He is too cowardly to personally face the person he intentionally hurt, and too embarrassed to interact with her now that she sees behind his mask.
Hopefully, this experience of actual pain and humiliation will ultimately lead the narcissist to seriously consider outcomes before intentionally destroying lives in the future. Narcissists’ personal interests are ALL that matter to them, so making it really hit home that abuse can backfire is our best chance of disabling these very sick predators.